Chapter Fourteen: My Recycled Soul by Lynette Ferreira
My mum calls from the bottom of the stairs, “Elizabeth, do you want some tea?”
I call back, “No thanks, Mum.”
“Okay,” I hear her mumble and then I hear her start a conversation with Esther.
My mind keeps nudging toward thoughts of Jared. Here I am, on the other side of the world and once again all I can manage in the romance department is another going nowhere, unreciprocated crush.
The light darkens quickly, so I decide to go downstairs to see what there is for dinner. I am starving.
Downstairs I walk into the kitchen and find everyone there, talking about his or her individual day. Sean looks content. He has started at the left wing of the manor, and he is planning to renovate the entire building within a period of two years.
Good Luck!
They all stop talking when they notice me walk in and Sean says, “Hey, Lizzie, come and sit here with us.”
I hate it when he calls me Lizzie, so I ignore him as I sit down at the kitchen island, and silently I watch my mum adding the last bits of ingredients to the food she is cooking. She is attempting an Irish stew, and it smells delicious.
They laugh and talk, not really including me, until my mum brings the food to the island.
When my mum sits down, we say grace and start eating.
Halfway through dinner, I say amused, “Sean, I hear your family is one of three families who used to rule the roost here, back in the day?”
He is very proud of his heritage, and he starts explaining, in his long lecturing way, “Yes, actually, we can now be classified as royalty.” He smiles and winks at Esther, while he continues, “This manor has fallen into disrepair over the last few decades, only because my father never had the intention of coming back to Ireland. Nobody has lived here for a very long time, so it is a wonder the ivy and wildlife never took over.”
Looking at the state of the place, I disagree. I cannot imagine why he thought the ivy and wildlife never took over.
He continues, “But in two years’ time you won’t recognize this place. It will be just as nice as those of our two neighbours.”
I interrupt him, “I have met our neighbours’ children, and one of them said there are eleven miles of land separating our house from theirs. Does all that land belong to them, or is it divided equally?”
“We do not own such a big portion, because some of it has been sold off to the neighbours over the years, but it would still take you a long while to walk from one boundary line to the next.”
He looks at Esther. “I think, although we don’t have enough land to farm on, we should get ourselves some horses or ponies.”
Esther’s face lights up and she asks, her voice an octave or two higher than usual, “Seriously?”
He laughs loudly. “Yes, your mum and I have already discussed it and if it is alright with you, we thought we would get you one for your next birthday.”
She looks at my mum and then Sean so fast—it makes me feel dizzy. She slides from the chair, and she hops, skips and jumps around the table, screaming at the top of her lungs in excitement. Her piercing yell is so loud I have to narrow my eyes to slits and put my hands over my ears tightly, to block out the noise. She has always dreamt of having a horse and now coming to Ireland her dream is coming true.
My mum’s cheeks are rosy, and she is smiling happily. The laughter reaches her eyes, making them shine. The only time there is ever a hint of doubt in her eyes for moving to Ireland is when she looks at me. I decide I am going to have to try harder at being happy.
Sean is in his element because, as he says, he is doing hard, manual labour and comes home exhausted every day.
I heard him say to my mum some time ago, while they were standing at the kitchen window looking out across the field that coming to Ireland had been the best decision they could have ever made. He could not imagine how he was ever happy living in all the smog and pollution, driving to work every day in standstill traffic, sitting in an office all day, going back home in standstill traffic. This, he said, is the life. He is outdoors all day, and all the fresh air makes him giddy. He grabbed onto my mum then, lifting her off the ground as if to prove how potent the air is. They both laughed and looked at each other lovingly.
It still amazes me how they act like two people deeply in love, after being married for so long already.
After we finish dinner, I start to clear the table. It is weekend, so it is my turn to tidy up the kitchen and to clear away the dishes. My mum, Sean and Esther go to the lounge, and I can hear the soft murmur of their voices as they talk. My mum is having a hard time getting Esther to settle down, because she is now over-excited about the horse, wanting to know its colour, its size, its gender, wondering what she should call it.
When I am finished in the kitchen I go and sit with them. Sean has lit a fire in the fireplace and the warmth is comforting. I sit down onto a chair, folding my legs in under me, and start watching a movie with my family.
During the movie Esther falls asleep with her head on Sean’s lap. We pause the movie so he can carry her up to her bed. Every time this happens, he complains for about fifteen minutes, while struggling to catch his breath, how he cannot believe how heavy she is. I always think then that she is ten after all, cannot be as light as a feather forever.
I have stubbornly evaded going to bed for as long as possible to avoid lying in the dark and thinking about Jared. Now I have no choice anyway but to say goodnight to my mum and Sean, before I fall asleep in front of the TV, as well. Imagine Sean’s complaints.
